What's it like to be you?

...an idea, a revelation and a request

What's it like to be you?

If you are rich, what's it like to be you? Poor, what's it like to be you? Young? Old? What's it like to be a kid in today's world? What would you tell your 10-year-old self about what lies ahead in life?

I want to know. I do.

I've been toying with an idea I'm going to run by you, my Substack column readers. I feel like we are friends. You spur me on with your likes, views, and shares, so I'm encouraged to ask for your feedback on an idea.

I was turning at the intersection of University and Second Avenue. A man was holding a sign asking for $20; I think it said 'for a bowl of weed.'

Well, that's honest, I thought. I wondered about this guy. What's his story? How'd he end up holding a cardboard sign at an intersection asking for dope money?

What if instead of handing him $20, I gave him a notebook and said, if you write me an essay about what it's like to be you, I'll come back two days from now and give you $50 for it. I might publish it here, I might not, but if he would make an effort to tell me his story, I'd pay him for it.

Here's my train of thought: what if I launched a Fifty Dollar Project, focusing on random Iowans, offering them $50 to write me an essay on what it's like to be them, on the farm, working in a factory, running a business. I'd create a separate Substack column and run the edited pieces. If the writer didn't need or want the $50, I'd use it for the next one who could use the money. Readers could pay $50 (or not) to subscribe to these autobiographical profiles, and proceeds would help fund the effort.

I've run it by four people so far, and three think it's a terrible idea. Giving notebooks to homeless panhandlers is potentially dangerous, said one. Another thought I'd be disappointed in what people wrote. She thinks non-journalists need to have their stories coached out of them, and not everyone is interesting. I ran it by someone else who loves the concept. She's my go-to rah, rah muse.

So, Richard thinks approaching a panhandler and offering them money for a story is demeaning. Since he's almost always right, I'm listening.

My rah-rah muse, Deb Engle, co-hosted a few people the other night in a Story Summit Writers School Zoom session on memoir writing. (It was terrific, by the way. Attendees of my Okoboji Writers' Retreat will get a chance to work with Deb in September). Anyway, on the call, three had been homeless at one point in their lives. They were in the process of writing their riveting stories. Because of this, I became buoyed the Fifty Dollar project might fly. I asked them about it and got a ‘thumbs up’ from a man who had been homeless. He added, give them a Starbucks gift card with the essay book, so they have a place to sit and have a cup of coffee while writing the essay.

So, I'm torn about the idea.

Here's a confession under the heading 'what it's like to be me.' I think up things all the time. Sometimes I act on them; often, I don't. Or, I'll start a project and abandon it when it becomes boring. A calligraphy pen set and an acoustic guitar all seemed like good ideas at first, but they found new homes after the next move.

I've given away boxes of paints and pastels. Currently, I have over 100 nautical charts stored under a guest room bed, a remnant of my days doing paintings of customer's boats on marine maps. It was a good business, and I can't tell you why I didn't stick with it. The website is still up. I should take it down: Art on Charts. I don’t think I’ll do it again unless I end up broke and have to go through another period of reinvention.

This wind-sock personality quirk has been given a label by my life partner of 21 years.

Richard might say, "Oh, is this another Annapolis Shipping News?" He refers to me starting a blog by that name when we lived in Annapolis. I interviewed cruisers anchoring in Annapolis Harbor and even had a shirt with an Annapolis Shipping News logo embroidered on the pocket.

A lovely yacht came to town, taking up the entire length of the downtown fuel dock. After super-sleuthing and a conversation with the dockhand, I discovered Johnny Depp owned it. Annapolis Shipping News had the story first!

I'd bop around in a 13' Boston Whaler, floating up to a mega yacht, handing the captain my homemade business card, and introducing myself as the editor of Annapolis Shipping News.

The Vajoliroja, owned by Johnny Depp

It turned out, the bigger the boat, the less they wanted to talk. Hmmm.

Annapolis Shipping News was short-lived. It might have flourished through the Substack format, come to think of it.

To use a sailing metaphor, I do tend to tack through life as the wind blows. That's a part of what it's like to be me. The one constant is my fascination with people and getting to know their stories.

In January of this year, I started this column, although I only write when I feel like it, which was daily during Covid quarantine. Not so often, now. Since there is no charge to subscribe, I don't feel pressure to keep it up or to have a weekly deadline. It’s fun, when I do, especially when you like it.

The Okoboji Writers' Retreat I started to put together last February has held my attention to the point where I'll probably do it again next year, even though it's a ton of work. Richard and I are debating whether or not it’s time to cap enrollment. I never dreamed I’d be turning people away six weeks out. It’s going to be a blast and feels purposeful for this semi-retired 70-year-old.

Now, what's it like to be you? What would you tell your 10-year-old self?

I'd tell my 10-year-old self to understand I would experience self-doubt, insecurity, unrequited love, loss, and failures but they would not outweigh the love of raising a son, having incredible career successes, forming lasting friendships, and finding Richard. I'd say, don't give in to those feelings of wanting to end it all because you're going to have a unique and rewarding life, connecting people, asking questions, learning, seeing the world, and even making a difference here and there.

If you're up for playing with me on this idea, here's a form to use as a thought-starter. Most answers are not required. Have fun. I won't publish it without your ok. But the world needs more human interest stories, don’t you think? It’s what helps us understand, not fear, one another.

Click: What it’s Like to be Me Form

Ideas are like boats. If not launched, there's not much point in having them.